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2
1

i believe the rapture happened
the day my grandmother died
but i guess no one else
was good enough to go then
all the priests and preachers
the president and each of us
were blatantly left behind
there were no reports
of vacated automobiles
or suddenly empty spots in line
the day of the rapture was
indeed an uneventful day


2
2

on the day the rapture happened
god glanced at my dear grandmother
then looked down at his creation
at the squalor and the ceaseless sin
the greed and bitterness and war
at the terror inflicted on all fronts
always in his name under a blind
conviction that his will be done
and as he watched distracted
by the din of self-directed prayer
he turned back toward my grandmother
with a sad repentant look and as
a tear ran down his radiant cheek
asked what on earth have i done

Posted by Rob on April 22, 2008
Tags: Uncategorized

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Total comments on this page: 8

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RG on paragraph 2:

This is primarily intended as an example comment, but the last line originally came to me as god dropping an f’bomb…

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April 22, 2008 10:42 pm
docrini on whole page :

I think the thing I like most about this poem is the way the quotidien is transformed, first by comparison with the grandmother and then as examples of the way the rapture is predicted to occur in some circles.

I also like the god-in-the-image of “man”; given the human propensity to make God as much like humans as possible, it seems only fitting to finish the poem with a tear.

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April 24, 2008 4:02 pm
RG :

Thank you, Rini, for your comments! May the audience here always be so kind!

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April 24, 2008 4:11 pm
julie ann on whole page :

I like the reverent tone of this poem and the words “squalor” and “ceaseless sin”. I don’t know if you need “dear” in front of grandmother though, it’s not necessary I think.

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April 26, 2008 12:57 pm
Sue walker on paragraph 1:

What a terrific opening here. It immediately attracts the reader’s attention. Such a compelling beginning makes the reader want to know what comes next.
SBW

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April 26, 2008 5:17 pm
Sue walker on paragraph 2:

Such a dynamic ending — as well as beginning. I like the notion that god–after looking at what he had made — has to wonder, why?

SBW

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April 26, 2008 5:19 pm
Vivian on paragraph 1:

The compelling first line plays well against the last line in this first stanza, “… an uneventful day.” Rob, you truly capture a common perception of the ‘rapture’ and set it in contrast to the Sodom and Gomorrah state of civilization today.

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April 27, 2008 3:34 pm
angelabrownky on whole page :

Hi Rob. Well, you already know I really love this poem. I like poetry that is more personal and i really like poetry written in the first person. Just my preference, I have no dislike for any other types (smile). I agree with Julie Ann that you can take out “dear.” I normally don’t like when God is humanized, but here, it works. You might consider taking away “radiant” and “sad” in Stanza 2. I think you want to shy away from making the piece too sentemental. Great job, Rob Gray. A

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May 14, 2008 6:55 am
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